Am I Autistic and Masking?
Are you an adult in New Jersey questioning whether you might be autistic? Maybe you've noticed patterns in your behavior that don't quite fit societal expectations—difficulty navigating social situations, sensory overload, or feelings of being “different” but didn’t have a name for it. Perhaps you’ve spent decades masking your true self to blend in, avoid judgment, or simply to get through daily life. If this resonates with you, you’re not alone—and you’re not broken. Many adults have spent years hiding their authentic selves, often unaware that their behaviors and experiences are part of a neurodiverse identity.
What Does It Mean to Question Autism?
If you’ve ever felt “different,” like social interactions are confusing, or your sensory experiences are intense and hard to explain, those are valid experiences. Perhaps you’ve wondered, “Why do I feel so overwhelmed in crowded places?” or “Why do I need to stim or retreat after social events?” These are common signs that might point to autism.
Questioning your neurodivergence can be a liberating experience. It’s an acknowledgment that your way of experiencing the world is valid, even if it doesn’t align with societal norms. It’s about understanding that your differences are part of the rich tapestry of human variation—nothing to be ashamed of.
Understanding Masking and Autism in Adults
Masking is a common coping strategy among neurodivergent individuals. It involves consciously or unconsciously hiding behaviors, suppressing natural responses like stimming, or mimicking neurotypical social cues. For many, masking helps prevent misunderstanding or rejection but comes at a significant personal cost.
While masking may seem to help in the short term, its long-term effects can be detrimental. It can lead to feelings of inauthenticity, frustration, and emotional exhaustion. Over time, suppressed sensory needs, social anxieties, and self-doubts can build up, resulting in burnout, depression, and heightened stress levels.
How Masking Impacts Your Physical and Mental Health
Beyond emotional strain, masking profoundly affects your physical health. The constant effort to hide real feelings, sensory reactions, or natural behaviors causes chronic stress. This persistent stress triggers your body's fight-or-flight response, leading to increased cortisol levels that can harm your cardiovascular system, weaken your immune response, and disturb your sleep.
Many adults discover that prolonged masking contributes to symptoms like migraines, gastrointestinal issues, fatigue, and difficulty concentrating. It can also lead to mental health challenges such as anxiety, depression, and feelings of burnout—sometimes to the point where managing daily responsibilities feels overwhelming.
Furthermore, this ongoing stress and exhaustion can make it very hard to identify your authentic self or seek support, trapping you in a cycle that isolates and drains you further.
The Importance of Neurodiversity-Affirming Evaluations in New Jersey
Getting clarity about whether you are autistic begins with a comprehensive, respectful assessment. It is important to seek an evaluation with a provider who specializes in adult autism evaluations that are neurodiversity-affirming—meaning they recognize and respect your unique experience, strengths, and challenges.
Traditional assessments can sometimes be focused on deficits or abnormality, which might inadvertently pathologize your identity. Neurodiversity-affirming evaluations, on the other hand, prioritize understanding your lived experience and emphasize your strengths and natural traits.
These assessments typically involve in-depth interviews, behavioral observations, and standardized testing, all conducted in a supportive environment. They aim to recognize autism as a form of neurodiversity rather than a disorder to be “fixed,” and they help you gain a clear understanding of your neurotype.
How an Evaluation Can Help You
Clarify whether your experiences align with autism
Understand your sensory processing, social preferences, and cognitive styles
Identify areas where you may need support or accommodations
Access resources, community, and advocacy options
Feel validated and empowered in your identity
Why Neurodiversity-Affirming Care Matters
Traditional assessments may overlook strengths or individual differences, focusing solely on what’s “wrong.” Neurodiversity-affirming care prioritizes your well-being, respects your identity, and supports your self-acceptance. It encourages viewing autism as a different way of experiencing the world—an inherent part of human diversity.
This approach reduces stigma, fosters resilience, and validates your experiences, helping you move toward greater self-understanding and happiness.
The Road to Self-Acceptance and Support
Once you have a clearer understanding of your neurodivergent identity, many adults experience a sense of relief and empowerment. You begin to see your experiences not as flaws but as natural variations in human cognition and sensory processing. This shift in perspective can open the door to tailored strategies that improve your quality of life, from sensory accommodations to social skills development, and mental health support.
Acknowledging and accepting your neurodivergence also allows you to seek out community and support networks. Connecting with others who share similar experiences can be affirming and help you feel less isolated in your journey.
The Benefits of Professional Support
Working with a clinician trained in neurodiversity-affirming assessment and care means you’ll receive guidance rooted in respect and validation. They can help you interpret your evaluation results, develop personalized coping strategies, and connect you to support services such as therapy or workplace accommodations that respect your identity.
If you’re considering an autism evaluation, it’s important to look for professionals who practice inclusively and prioritize your comfort and dignity. An environment that recognizes neurodiversity promotes honesty and openness, helping you uncover your authentic self without fear of judgment.
Begin Unmasking and Embracing Your Autisitc Traits With an Autism Evaluation in Middlesex, NJ
If you suspect you might be neurodivergent, don't hesitate to seek an Autism Evaluation. Understanding your Autistic traits is the first step towards embracing them and finding the support you need. Reach out to a neurodivergent affirming therapist at True Reflections and start your journey toward self-awareness and empowerment. Follow these three simple steps to get started:
Request an appointment to get scheduled and evaluated for Autism
Begin meeting with a skilled neurodivergent affirming therapist
Start embracing your traits!
Other Services Offered at True Reflections
At True Reflections Mental Health Services, I’m here to help you find your true self and help you overcome anything with therapy. So in addition to providing you support with your neurodivergent traits with ADHD and Autism Assessments, I also offer Autism and Anxiety Therapy, ADHD and Anxiety Therapy, Trauma Therapy for ADHD and Austim, Affirming Therapy for those with ADHD, Affirming Therapy for those with Autism, and Prenatal and Postpartum Therapy. I also offer different treatment modalities such as Play Therapy, Sandtray Therapy, EMDR Therapy, DBT Therapy, and more. My services are offered in both Middlesex, NJ as well as online in the state of New Jersey and Florida. Check out my blog for more topics!
Janine Kelly, MSW, LCSW, C-NDAAP, ADHD-CCSP, ASDCS, PMH-C, RPT-S™, C-DBT, CBT-C, CCATP-CA, CATP is a neurodivergent psychotherapist and the Founder of True Reflections Mental Health Services in Middlesex, NJ. She provides support and Neurodiversity Affirming Comprehensive ADHD & Autism Evaluations to children, teens, and adults in-person in Middlesex, NJ and virtually in the state of New Jersey and Florida. Janine specializes in the diagnosis of ADHD & Autism in girls and women.
To request an ADHD & Autism Evaluation, please click below: